Who ever said love was easy it isn't. And one thing I have learned throughout this relationship is that it is so easy to fall in love, but harder to fall out of it. Especially when you have been with someone as long as I have. I know I've got a long road ahead of me in getting over him. We had some good times and even til this day he still can make me laugh til I cry. But I guess that isn't enough anymore. And it hurts like hell. Sometimes I wish I could be as strong and hard as he is because I cant see any pain in his eyes. But I am sure he can see that I am hurt, its written all over my face. I try to be strong for my kids because I don't want them to see that I am upset and I definitely don't want them to know whats going on. I know they love their dad more than he even realizes. And they are going to be just as hurt as I am if not more. That's three people's pain that I have to bare. Lucky me.
The truth is I love him with all of me. And my heart hurts every time I think about that day when we are both over each other and have moved on to be with other people. As much as I know that sometimes you don't get what you want and just because you love someone it doesn't mean that you are right for each other I wish we were right for each other. He's been my best friend for over 10 years. He's the only guy I ever lived with.At night when I couldn't sleep he was the one that I would crack jokes with. And no matter how many of the jokes were about people in his family he still laughed. Now I am just suppose to start over with someone brand new. How am i when I cant stop thinking about him.
Thanks for Listening!
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